The Olive Oil Saga

In honor of a three day weekend that I don't get, decorating my apartment, loving my first week of work, learning SO MUCH about wine, having a clean kitchen, Friday night, and almost being out of laundry, I now present to you...

The Olive Oil Saga: A True Story

Guys, I have a problem.

It's really bothering me.

Do you see this olive oil?

I said, do you SEE THIS OLIVE OIL??

I can't get the cap off.

I tried as hard as I could...

...but it just won't come off!

What to DOOO???

I just wanna cook this onion...

...but I CAN'T!!

Maybe I can use these scissors to help (unsafe).

Noitstillwon'tcomeoffff

And now it's DAMAGED!

BUT WAIT!

OHMYGOSH!!

It came off!  Now I can...

...do this!!!

And this!!!  (Those are onions, photobooth isn't the best camera in the world)

So happy.

I love you, olive oil.

And you, kind readers, for your support.

Happy Friday!
Courtney

I Want to Be Internet Famous

All these people who are Internet famous are like, "one day I was living my normal boring life and I had this random idea and then I was famous and I can't believe it this is so crazy."  Like the Pioneer Woman.  Or Texts From Last Night.  Or Amy's other BFF Teresa who has this website called My Mom is a Fob, which is actually really hilarious, and now she has a book deal and can afford a way better apartment than me.  And I just ask myself... why can't I be one of those people??

Or this girl, who created a YouTube channel, in, like, March, and is now mad viral and famous.  Plus, I want her to be my friend because we have so many things in common.  LIKE being in our early adulthood.  In New York City.  Living in tiny-ass apartments.  Drinking a lot.  Saying funny shit.  Being slightly nerdy.  ALL OF THESE THINGS!  She made My Drunk Kitchen and it's really effing hilarious.  This is my favorite episode because it's about tacos and I love tacos and margaritas.

I don't want to be Internet famous because of the fame or the money (okay, a little bit, maybe).  I want to be Internet famous because I really love external validation most of the time.  Why do you think I have this blog where I just talk about whatever I want all the time?  I'm not gonna come back and read this crap (well, except for maybe the Jorge incident).  I want you people to read my blog, think it's awesome, and then tell me that.  And you do, sometimes.  And I love you for that.

So really, people... help me think of something.  My last name is a rap slang term, for crying out loud.  It just needs to happen.

I'M READY TO SHINE!
Lurve,
Courtney

What To Eat When You're Broke

Today was my first day of work, and I belieeeeve I shall adjust to corporate life quite well.  The people are great (another Fordham grad is a newbie too, if the company hired two Fordham grads, they obvs know what's good for them) and I think once I get into the groove of things, it'll go smoothly.  And commuting from Brooklyn is actually a lot better than I thought... though I can't wait to get to the UES.

Until my first paycheck comes in, or at least until after my gradumacation party on Saturday (whee!), I'm kind of broke.  Andrea and I went to the grocery store yesterday, and for the first time, I seriously paid attention to the prices of food.  So now, I shall instruct you on what one can eat when they are on a budget.

Tuna sandwich.  Tuna = on sale + not bad without condiments = buy 5 cans and eat every day.

Enjoy that tuna sandwich, college grad.

It was your idea to move to Manhattan and leave behind your free shrimp scampi and steak 'n potatoes.  Eat.  Every.  Last.  Bite.  Of.  That.  Shit.

Steal your ex-roomie's spices to pretend like you're not eating tuna from a can and generic brand mayo.  You're quite the gourmet chef, my friend.  A regular MacGyver.

Bread you bought for tuna + cherry jam (on sale) + crunchy peanut butter that your roomie used to have at your old apartment which basically makes it yours = PB&J!!  Good job, you just got yourself some VARIETY!  10 points for Gryffindor!

Chex Mix, 2 for $3, on sale.  No Cheez-its for you, madam.  $4.59 a BOX?  I'm not DONALD TRUMP over here, friends, do you see a comb over anywhere on this head??

Carrots = necessary.  Need.  No matter what.  Hummus, not on sale = SPLURGE!  Guard with your life.  It's spinach and artichoke flavor.

Greek yogurt = 5 for $4.  Hello, breakfast!  You need your protein, commuter.

And lots and lots of.... water.  FREE SUSTENANCE!  Drink up, my friend, because you shall be consuming this in abundance until you can shank some leftovers from the pulled pork this weekend.  Can you say "WINNING!!!!"???

I like food.  I miss food.  Please come back.

Love,
Courtney

Skype Date

Looking for roommates feels like dating.  I suck at dating.  I don't do it very often.

Wooooooowww that sounded so pathetic.

So anyways, I'm just chillin' here with Erin waiting to have a Skype potential roomie date and watching Man v. Food.  Some of the food makes me want to nom.  Some makes me want to vom.  OH HEY THAT RHYMED!!!

Uhm so anyways since we're bored we decided to do this...

Oh herro, dere, can I see you???

Nommin on glasses?

I don't even know.

Oh dear.

I DON'T DYE MY HAIR I SWEAR WTF???

Yyyyeeeesssss??!!??

Let us ponder...

Oh yeah, that's my cat.  I took this picture a couple weeks ago.  He's pretty cool.

Uhmmmmm I have nothing else to write kthxbye.

Love,
Courtney and Erin bein' fools

A Compilation

Over the course of our trip to NOLA, I took many pictures, as I always do.  You see, with only one other person on the trip, there was only one person to take photos of me on vacation.  And that person was Jen.  So what better way to get a person to take a picture of you than to take a picture of them first?

Thus... I ended up with the following compilation of photos...

(Dear Jen... I really love you.  Don't forget that you love me too.  Love, Courtney)

"I have no makeup on, Courtney.  Fine, I guess you can take a picture."

"Uh, okay, I don't really know why you're taking a picture, though."
 

"But we look like hot messes!  Okay, it's Bourbon Street."

"STOP IT!  DO NOT TAKE THAT PICTURE!"

"I'll smile while we sit on the waterfront, but it's slightly under protest."

"Why are you taking a picture of me while I'm eating??"

"Oh god.  That picture.  Not okay."

*Begrudgingly drags her feet to the railing of the steamboat*

"I love you, Court, but I'm totally getting sick of this."

"These.  Pictures.  I.  Am.  Done."

"DO NOT POST THAT PICTURE ON FACEBOOK!!!"
Me: "Fine, fine, I won't."

Hey, I kept my word, didn't I??

I lurve you, Jen!

Love,
Courtney