Friday, July 9, 2010

World Cup Reporting at its Finest

Apparently the Germans have a secret weapon when it comes to betting on World Cup wins: an octopus.  When I read this headline, I saw "Octopus Paul" and I felt really bad for whatever poor guy had done something to earn the nickname "octopus."  Uhm, no.  That would be an actual octopus that is stirring up fans from around the world to write both love letters and death threats to his home... er, tank.

You see, for every World Cup game (and the European Championship games in 2008), Paul's caretakers place him in a tank with two small tanks with mussels inside, decorated for the two teams in the respective match.  In this case, Paul definitively decided his choice, making a beeline for the Spain tank without even a glance towards the Holland tank.

This harsh lack of any consideration for the underdogs in Holland has undoubtedly angered some football-soccer fans.  Acquarium manager Stefan Porwoll was quoted as saying, "I even told our guards and people at the entrance to keep a close look at possible for football fans coming after Paul for revenge."  Wanting to protect his country's avid supporter, Spanish Prime Minister Jose Luis Rodriguez Zapatero offered to help: "I am concerned about the octopus," he said. "I'm thinking about sending in a team to protect the octopus because obviously it was very spectacular that he should get Spain's victory right from there."

But you better place your bets now - according to the article, Paul is already over the hill.  At age 2 1/2, he's getting close to the supposed normal life expectancy of an octopus in captivity: 3 to 4 years.  Some will undoubtedly hope that Paul goes out on a high note, correctly predicting a win for Spain in the finals and going down in octopus-soccer-predicting history.

Me, on the other hand?  An octopus is an octopus.  HUP HUP HOLLAND!

Love and unexpected amuzement,

The reporting in this article actually is an excellent balance on the edge of "serious" reporting and sarcasm.  Check it out at NBC Sports.

1 comment:

  1. I also find the whole octopus rather ridiculous and amusing.